Thanks.

Remember that Christina Agulara song "Thank You/Stronger"?
Yeah..I dont want to either.
But she had a point in singing about how her recent breakup changed her, and how she became a better person for it.
It's hard for me not to feel hurt and alone these days, but to counter those feelings, I want to write out a list saying Thank You to my ex:

Snezhana Bavykina, Thank You For:

1. Taking care of me when I was sick.
I get sick alot and my periods are just hell. Thank you for bringing me water, pain meds, and an occasional fluffy ferret to ease the cramps.

2. Bringing me Flowers.
Yes, I know both times were out of guilt, but still, I love flowers. I'm a sucker for romantic crap like that, and my (un)birthday was great. Even if it was all just a guilt thing.

3. Holding my hand in public.
Again, not sure if this was more just an attention thing, but it still felt nice for a girl not to be (visibly) ashamed to be with me. In Calgary, that would never happen.

4. Showing me how much crap I put up with.
Holy christ! I MUST get more respect for myself!

5. Making me feel warm and loved.
Even if it was a short period of time.

6. Letting me into your home when you barely knew me.
Okay, 2011 was a bum year. I didnt have my own room until the beginning of 2012.
I was living with some not-so-nice people I thought were my friends, and after the third potential roommate bailed out on me, you offered your couch and livingroom.
Thanks man. You saved me a lot of grief.

7. Making me feel sexy.
Part of me is super feminine, and no matter how I try to hide it, it comes out at vulnerable times.
You made me feel so attractive, to which I must find in myself.

8. Cuddling.
I need touch. I dont (and never did) get enough. I adored snuggling.

9. Being crazy.
I have yet to work at a place where I'm not the weirdo.
Sometimes, you matched the craziness I impose on the world, which really does alot for me.

10. Accepting me into your life.
Even though this relationship turned into a shit show, and had always been illicit, I would have kicked myself in the ass if I didnt enter in it.
You were (and still are) an amazing woman. You're dishonest, self absorbed and narrcisistic, but you're also caring, beautiful and showed a girl a good time.
I'll miss you.